Search Replace: Iraq with Syria….Syria with Iran

It’s hard to isolate where “This May be Satire” began. Some sources would posit that 3rd grade play where I was Prince John and a delay in rotating scenes left me having to do improvised standup for an audience of parents that were generous enough to laugh at my 3rd grade improvised standup jokes, in character a Prince John, about the delay. However since I don’t have that, this may be one of the first on the blogs. (10/1/2023)

This is starting to sound like a broken record player …put behind a cut for its highly sarcastic and probably bitter-sounding nature. Or those who are just overall sick of politics at this point.

There’s Al-Quedai in Iraq! No, now they’ve fled to Syria… never mind we’ve found them in Iran. Quit paying attention to proven threats of Al-Quedai in Peshtun Pakistan, Yemen, Saudia Arabia, Germany and the US…only Axis of Evil Countries(tm) have Al-Queadi who are threatening.

Iraq has weapons of mass destruction! Wait maybe they’re buried in Iraq…we were sure they were there just a minute ago. Nope the weapons were shipped to Syria, definitely Syria…um…hey LOOK over there to the east, Iran is building nuclear weapons and will have a functional bomb by 2005! I swear, defectors who have absolutely no political stake in a deposed Iraq…er Iran told me so. This time I mean it, scouts honor! Don’t worry, they won’t have bombs before 2005 unless we get troops in place and are ready to bypass international opinion again. Iraq is brutally oppressing its ethnic minorities. Oppression of civil rights based on ethnic minorities will not be allowed to stand, because as a free democracy of a proud and powerful nation like ours with a rich history of oppressing the civil rights of our own ethnic minorities we should know. The stories of torture chambers, political repression, inhumane tactics, and stifling of self-determination will soon be making front page news (and we’re not talking about our ally Israel this time) which will give us retro-justification on successful regime change in Iraq..I mean Iran.

Tax cuts stimulate the economy. Really the largest tax cut ever in 2000 stimulated the economy. Er…I mean the third largest in 2003, really, we mean it this time. Because if businesses aren’t already spending, giving them more money back will cause them to spend more…er…I think…trust me on this one. Besides that since Americans have taken $ 3 trillion out of the stock market now is the time to cut taxes on dividends to put more back into the pockets of…er……look over there, Iran again, did I mention NUCLEAR BOMBS? Do you want a NUCLEAR BOMB smuggled into the US by Iran? See…knew you’d forget that whole tax cut/economy thing.

No worries, our regime-changing machine is ready to go into action again. Let’s see we can use covert means to destabilize a government and replace it with one that is western friendly even if not representative of the majority. Now where have we done that before…oh yeah…in Iran in the 1950’s. The US-backed Shah replaced via coup a democratically elected (but nonwestern friendly) Iranian government. Fast forward a few decades of Shah oppression, torture, and political repression and viola, the Iranian revolution, and a decades-long seething hatred for the US. But never mind that…by that time we’ll be regime-changing some other part of the world. And let me tell you about the WMD THEY’LL have…look out El Salvador, you’re next!

Tim C.